Head for the hills – Bangladesh is going nuclear

Everyone knows about how the chronic power-cuts are crippling Bangladesh, but the proposed solution could cripple the world – Bangladesh has apparently been granted approval by the IAEA for a nuclear power plant.

It’s not a joke. But it should be.

Given how farcically and tragically incompetant the government is here, certainly the old corrupt one, I wouldn’t trust an AA battery to Bangladesh, much less a nuclear power-plant. As my friend put it yesterday, who was it who looked at a map of Asia and thought: “I wonder where to put this incredibly dangerous and sophisticated piece of nuclear technology….? Ah yes, the Desh”. They’re going to have flourescent blood on their hands.

If this absurd development ever takes off, here’s what will happen: Both the Awami League and BNP will claim it had been their idea all along. Some commentators will claim that it was Bangladeshis who actually invented nuclear power. The military government will illegally arrest and throw in jail everyone who questions the money behind it. Some commentators will discover that it’s foreign technology, not Bangladeshi, and dismiss nuclear power as foreign ‘interference’. The uranium itself will be delivered to the border under the highest possibly security, and then transported the rest of the way through Bangladesh on a rickshaw.

The RAB will be assigned to protect the plant. Experienced nuclear engineers will ‘sense the RAB’s presence, and open fire, forcing the RAB to return fire.’ The RAB will kill everyone and get away with it. New Bangladeshi engineers will be appointed who wouldn’t know how to re-wire a plug, but would also be family members of someone in the caretaker-government/military.

The plant won’t work. People will be puzzled that there’s no extra power, but curiously Bangladesh has started exporting power to someone else and all the money’s going to Switzerland. People in the area will start eating radioactive rice because all the spent fuel will be chucked over the fence. The military will arbitrily arrest thousands more people. The RAB will go in and shoot more people in self-defence. Both the Awami League and BNP will blame the military and each other, saying that either Sheikh Rahman/General Zia knew exactly how to handle nuclear power. Commentators will write more and more articles saying absolutely nothing useful.

I will be looking at property in northern Finland.


2 Responses to “Head for the hills – Bangladesh is going nuclear”

  1. 1 Zahid Hossain June 28, 2007 at 4:36 am

    Nice to read a fun story though we are really suffering of power crisis.

  2. 2 Hasina Arrested July 16, 2007 at 3:01 am

    The Ex-Prime Minister of Bangladesh – Sheikh Hasina has been arrested 2 hours ago. She is being taken to the court as we speak. Please follow a report here –>


    And please, DIGG the news – and let the world know of this power hungry viscious Military Ruling that is going on in our country right now.

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